Gary's Mostly Pointless Blog

Hi guys and welcome to my first #FridayFlash of twenty-ten!

As I said in an earlier post, I’ve kind of lost track of Brad and Joe and I just now managed to track them down.  As I’ve also said in an earlier post, I’ve gone through some big changes.   Where ever I might have been taking these two has changed due to, what the kids call, “IRL” issues.

So, I applied the same method to these guys as I would to a lock that I’ve lost the key to: I decided to bash it open with a sledge hammer.  This is a bit of a different one for those of you that have kept up with my boys.  You’ve been warned.

Here it is, a new #FridayFlash for the new year: Old Acquaintance.

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Joe made his way uneasily down the hall to Brad’s apartment.  Joe wasn’t feeling at the top of his game; a little nauseous, a slight headache, but this was to be expected.  It was New Year’s Day and he and Brad had tied one on the night before.  Actually, they tied a few on.  Actually, to do the metaphor any justice, Joe had to say that they had rented an industrial grade tying machine and spent the entire night tying whatever they could get their hands on to whatever else they could tie things to.

Joe knocked on the door and Brad answered it with a blanket draped around his shoulders.  “Bradley,” Joe said less enthusiastically than he normally would.  “You look like…” but Joe didn’t bother with his usual quip.  “Hell, you look like I feel.”

Brad grunted and lead Joe into his living room.  Joe was about to ask whether to order from Dominoes, Pizza Hut or to try that new place that opened up just down the street when Brad cut him off.  “I’ve got something for you to see.”

Joe yawned.  “What’s up?  TV broke again?”

Brad collapsed into the couch.  He motioned to the coffee table and Joe saw it.

“What…what’s that?” Joe said narrowing his eyes at the piece of paper on the table.

“I made…” Brad said, “I made a list.”  Joe sighed and hung his head.

They had many discussions, usually in the days leading up to New Year’s Eve, about how dumb they thought New Year’s resolutions were.  They’re usual point was that it was a little silly that we as a society pick an arbitrary point in our orbit around the Sun to make major life changes.  In these discussions, they would usually mention the fact that New Year’s resolutions were never kept and that they were so unrealistic that if an individual really wanted to make the change, they would do it long before.  Unless there was something seriously holding someone back, they should have to will power to change their own lives.  Joe picked up the list and read each numbered entry.

“Alright, number one…drink less?  What is this crap?  Did you find God last night or something?” Joe said.

Brad shrugged reluctantly.  “Just keep reading.”

“Number two: Take work more seriously, work on promotion.”  Joe smirked at his friend and almost laughed.

“Let’s see…Number three: Start dating Courtney.”  Joe laughed.  “Well, just between you and me, I think that ship has sailed.  I mean, you definitely had your shot there for a minute but the whole, you know, snot on your jeans thing might have sealed the deal for you.  Besides, I think she’s seeing that Jason guy, isn’t she?  You know he drives a Lexus, right?”  Brad said nothing and Joe continued.

“Number four…finish novel and write more short stories?  Huh?  You write?”

“No, I don’t really know what that one is about.  It’s not even in my handwriting, see?  That must be someone else’s resolution.”

“Somebody else’s resolution?  Whose?” Joe said.

“I don’t know, just keep reading.”

Joe was laughing freely now.  “Alright…Number five…go to the gym more often?!  Who are you kidding?!”  Brad looked away.

“Ahh…number six: read more books.  Yeah, sure.  You have the attention span of a goldfish.  Is this some kind of joke dude, because this is funny stuff!”

“Read the last one,” Brad said, not seeing anything funny.

“Number seven,” Joe said.  His smile faded.  “What is this?”

“”Go ahead, read it out loud like you did with all the other ones.”

“Brad, seriously, what is–”

“Read it!” Brad said.  His voice bounced off the drywall of his apartment and made Joe flinch.

“Number seven: Stop doing everything Joe tells me to do.  Stop being lead around by Joe.  Stop being Joe’s lapdog.  Stop doing things that I don’t want to do because Joe says so.”

They sat in silence as the snow fell outside.  A car spun its wheels in thick white slush somewhere outside.

“So what is this?” Joe said.  “What?  You don’t want to be friends any more?”

“No, it’s just…you know how you get some times man.  I mean, how many people do you know that don’t want anything to do with you because you’re…you know…”

“Because I’m what?” Joe said, raising his hands of the armrests of Brad’s chair; the same chair he always sat in the morning after they’d go out drinking.  “People that don’t talk to me because I’m me?  Is that what you were going to say?”

“No, it’s just…you come off strong all the time.  You know, abrasive.  People don’t like to be manhandled all the time.”

“And that’s what you think I do to you, right?”  Joe stood up, face red and furious.  “What, do you think I’m some kind of bully or something?  Do you think I just order you around?  Do you think that I really think of you like you my lapdog?”

“Yes!” Brad shouted, springing to his feet.  “Yes I do.  And dude…I’m sick of it.”  Brad turned away from him and walked over to the iced over window in his living room and stared out into the New Year’s day white landscape.  He put his hand on the window and it was cold and stinging.

“Fine,” Joe said flatly and unemotionally.  “If that’s the way you want it dude–if that’s the way you feel–cool.  No fucking problem.”

Brad heard Joe walk out of the living room and close his front door.  Brad continued staring out the window and slowly became aware of how cold his hand was.  He brought his hand away from the window, wiped it on his blanket and put his hand in his arm pit.  He watched as the water his hand had melted run down until it stopped altogether and started freezing again.

Brad picked up his phone and started dialing.

“Yeah, order for delivery please?…The usual?  No…better make it a medium this time…”